UK Skin Cancer and Melanoma Patients

[trish reid]

Having read some of the messages I wondered if there was anyone in a similar position. My partner visited his GP in November 2003 with a suspicious mole (it looked terrible to be honest and was itchy). The GP referred him immediately and he saw a Dermatologist at Calderdale Royal Hospital within three days. She looked at it, told him it was OK and the itching was something he would have to live with! At the time I was not happy with the diagnosis, but as she was a Specialist you tend to believe they know what they are talking about. We have since found out to our cost, they don't always. The mole grew and he went back to his GP in February who again referred him to the Dermatologist who saw him the next day and removed it. We went back three weeks later for the biopsy report expecting to be told it was nothing, only to be informed it was in fact a malignant melanoma which was 7mm deep. He has now had a wider excision, 30 mm either side of the original, CT scan which was clear and is now being checked on a regular basis. The worse thing is the emotional effect this has had on both of us. He gets very down as he feels he has been given a death sentence and it is very hard always trying to be positive for him as I feel devastated as well. Everyone else I have read about seems to have had shallow melanomas but still have secondaries. It would be helpful to hear from anyone who has also had such a deep melanoma and to hear of their experiences re diagnosis etc.

[Charlotte]

Hi Trish,

I'm really sorry that your husband has suffered in the way he has with the initial treatment he got. It just goes to prove that they do get it wrong!

I'm sorry I can't give any info or experience about a deep MM as mine was 1.1mm.

My heart goes out to you both, it is a very difficult time emotionally for everyone. I wish you both all the best for the future and hope that he now gets the treatment he requires.

Best wishes
Charlotte

[Susie]

Hi Trish..( and to your hubby too !)

I can really understand how he and you must both be feeling. My MM was 3mm deep and had a WLE also.( plus being 17 weeks pregnant at the time) Im still under Christies Hospital for regular checks.
The question he is asking is one that I constantly am fighting. And to date I have not found a definative answer. I ask the question about recurrance and spread and no one seems to know, or is prepared to give an answer.There are apparently models ( on US sites) in which you can put your details in and they can provide some answers in a generalised terms. But I wouldnt recommmend these. It is just a case of learning to live with it which I know is very very hard, especially as my self and both you and your husband were totally un prepared for the diagnosis.

What I do know is that the outcome, ie whether it will spread is very un predictable.

I try to take comfort in the fact that no matter how much i worry, this will not have any effect on what may or maynot happen. This is so very hard to do and something i chant over and over to myself , like a mantra( and yes i do get funny looks, but what the hell !)

It may help you and your hubby to find some specialised support from your local cancer care centre, where they can provide support and counselling to help you both.
Take care you two, and you are among folks, who know exactly what you are going through
Susie x

[jimboww]

Hi Trish

Your partner and I could be related! I was diagnosed with a 7mm tumour back in May 2002. My GP thought it was nothing, but as it was itchy and bothering me she removed it, and then called me in for the bad news the following week.

Again, like your hubby, CT scans, (all clear), and a WLE followed, since when three monthly checks with Derm have become six monthly cursory glances, (my last appointment took less than two minutes).

Things do get easier over time, but I will be the first to admit I must have been hell to live with for quite a while after diagnosis - but at least you can tell 'the other half' there's another 7mm'r out there who's still going strong two years later!

Jimboww