UK Skin Cancer and Melanoma Patients

[Marsha]

I hold my hand up, I am that melanoma patient that sun bathed excessively. During my mid to late teens on that very rare occassion that we had a sunny day, or heaven forbid a whole sunny summer during the school holidays, I would think nothing of spending the whole day at the outdoor baths or lying in the garden. Sometimes I used sun tan oil, sometimes I didn't. Sometimes I burned, most often I didn't.

Even earlier, I came from a time when kids went out to play as soon as they got up and came home when it went dark, rain or shine. We wore shorts, t-shirts and sandals in the summer and SPF hadn't been invented.

Further back still, we still have some jittery old colour cine film that shows me on holiday in the South of France, age 2 and a half, filling my drawers with stones on the beach and I'm definitely sporting a tan.

Fast forward til I'm 19 and my first holiday abroad since that time (too many siblings came along in the interim to make continental holidays a way of life). I spent an absolute fortune on sun products, including a special high protection cream for my face... it was SPF 7. And yes, I burned. I spent one night lying in a bath of cold water, and let me tell you that never happened again!

And for a few years, a week or a fortnight a year in France or Spain, even Turkey one year became the norm. But after the bath incident I was a lot more careful, built it up steadily, stayed out of the midday sun etc etc.

I will even hold my hand up to using a sunbed. Not a great deal, I was never tangoed like the young girls you see today, but I would have a couple of sessions before going on holiday, just to "prepare" my skin. I even had a couple before my wedding, just to have a healthy glow and "prepare" my skin for the honeymoon in Turkey.

Then my daughter came along, and she had such beautiful, clear skin, not a blemish or a mark in sight, pretty much how mine had been when I was a baby. And the penny dropped. Being in the sun causes MOLES! You know these mole checks that you're supposed to do once a month? It would take me a month to do mine...what is it, more than 50 and you could be at risk of developing melanoma.. I have more that 50 on one arm alone... anyhoo, I digress...

But what I'm saying is I am that person that sunbathed, I am that person that used a sunbed, but am I to blame? In 1964 was it wrong to take your child to play on a beach in the South of France? In 1977 was it wrong to be at the lido with all my friends, having fun in the sun, sniffing in the heady aroma of Ambre Solaire and eating ice cream? In 1980 was it wrong to be lounging on the beach in Sitges waiting for the helados man to come around, with my super expensive SPF 7 Bergasol cream?

Well if it was wrong, I wish someone had told me then.

I'm not shirking responsibility here, because back then I don't think responsibility came into it. By and large we were just not aware of the damage that the sun could cause. I have melanoma, it certainly almost is as a result of my lifestyle, but is it my fault? I say no.

Now, if I develop lung cancer as a result of smoking, I will accept that that is my fault... entirely...bacause I was warned, I know the risks.

Marsha x

[seanty]

Hi Marsha,

of course we aren't certain that UV causes MM, and even if we were, no individual can ever be certain that their MM was caused by their UV exposure.

Even if we were certain that an individual caused their own MM, death does seem, a harsh punishment for excessive sunbathing, and it's hard to see how unfounded self-blame is life-enhancing. But then I am a man! LOL.

[Shaz41]

Here here Marsha. I reiterate everything you have said and like Sean says also, there is no evidence that UV has actually caused MM, only a possibility.
I read an article somewhere a while ago that pointed to traumas that could have triggered MM too. A doctor who was diagnosed with it did a study of his patients with MM and the majority had had some kind of trauma happen to them just before being diagnosed with MM. Now of course, no one knows for sure what actually causes it, but NO ONE should be blamed for self inflicting it upon themselves.
My dermatologist told me I am fair skinned and freckly?? I don't have many freckles at all or indeed many moles. But like you, I enjoyed safe sunbathing the older I got, but was burned as a child as like you, back then, the lotions etc were just not available/thought to be too important etc etc.
At the end of the day we are all unlucky victims and not culprits and again as Sean says, we do not deserve the life threatening prognosis MM can bring no matter how much we may have 'enjoyed' the sun.
Sharonx

[jaqlyn]

I totally agree Marsha,

I remember my childhood being similar to yours, summer holidays were long days spent outside in the garden, I do have memories of using sun cream but I dont think it was much cop back then and no higher than factor 8 and I do remember getting burnt. Our first holiday abroad was when I was about 15 to the south of France but most of our holidays were to north wales or days out to southport or blackpool haha. As a young adult my annual holidays were ofc to sunny climes such as Turkey, Spain, the Canaries and it was the norm to grab a sun lounger and laze all day around the pool in the sun.

Like you say there wasn't much warning about skin cancer and I had never heard of malignant melanoma..until I was diagnosed. Surely if it was caused purely by UV wouldn't malignant melanoma be more common? because I know of so many people that dont even use sun cream and hammer sunbeds but are not in our situation right now. We all must know at least one hardcore sun worshipper with a perma tan walking around without a care in the world and yet MM will never affect them, so i cannot accept that my infrequent attempts at tanning exclusively caused my MM.

As Sharon says we are victims not culprits and what we desperately need is answers not blame !

[lozza]

I totally agree with everything that has been said on this thread as well. I am also relieved I'm not the only one. In my early twenties on beach holidays I though i was beeing good using factor 15 for the first few days then down to factor 8. Have also been known to start off with no suncream on my legs as they didn't tan very easily. I also used sunbeds for about a week before a holiday. However it is also true that despite more people having heard of Melanoma now there are still a lot of people walking round looking like they have been tango'ed and going on sunbeds every week.

The trauma thing is interesting as I did go through quite a big trauma a few months before being diagnosed.

One thing I do know is that I gave up blaming myself, it got boring...!

[brian b]

hi marsha, well i confess to being a sun addict also, for the past 20 odd years i have slowly roasted myself in factor 20 lotion, two or three a years. im fairly certain i didnt burn myself, except for once i burned the top of my feet. this was before i used suntan lotion and about 25 years ago. yes my mole was on the top of my right foot, so do i read into it that that was when i got it, who knows. i have asked my onc., about what happens now, re. sunshine. i said iv got it now so what the hell. my thinking is, rightly or wrongly, this disease might not come back and i could live to a ripe old age. i would then think damn i havnt lived my life properly and enjoyed myself. or conversely it could come back in the near future and then i would think, b****r i should have gone and felt the sun on my back,lovely,. so 4 weeks ago i took the bull by the horns and had two weeks in S.Africa and after all the worry and stress of the last 12 months it was absolutely fab., to be somewhere hot. i dont know does this mean im acting stupidly, i dont know. but life still has to go on. its interesting what was mentioned about stress, as the previous 18 months prior to being diagnosed i had gone through a very stressfull time, death in the family and divorce etc. maybe it wasnt the sun after all, or is that me looking for an excuse so i can have a summer holiday.lol. anyway enough of this waffling on, its strange what this disease causes to run through your mind. brian bx

[Marsha]

I think I've reached the "bugger it" stage too, Brian. Last year I bought a puppy with the idea that we would take dog friendly holidays in England (obviously that wasn't the sole reason for buying the pup, but I'm blowed if I can remember the other reasons as I survey the chewed walls) but it doesn't quite hit the spot. I want to be somewhere warm, I want to relax on a lounger by a pool with a good book (trashy novel), I don't want to wear a kagoul, I want to feel the sun on my face, I want to wear white linen and toe post sandals (not a great look with the compression stocking, but hey ho!), I don't want to have mottled blue and white skin, I want to eat suckling pig in Mallorca, I want to eat out every night without a yapping dog, I want to make it to the top of the Calvari Steps, I want to sleep in a bed with only sheets on it, I want to look at blue sea and an even bluer sky, jeez I would even like to sweat without it being a hot flush!

So bugger it... I'm gonna do it!

Marsha x

[LynnPJ]

Go for it Gal!!!!!!!!
I am crying laughing and boy do I need a laugh just now.
xxxxxxxxxxxLynn

[brian b]

hi marsha, ditto. dont forget a dog is for life, a holiday is 2 to 4 weeks 2 or 3 times per year difficult decision hhhmmm. as regards the sexy sock, i was a little wag whilst away. i didnt wear it how does that qualify in the living dangerous stakes, and funnily enough i didnt swell up and explode. but im certainly at the sod it stage, what will be will be, but if the worst comes to the worst at least i will go down having enjoyed myself. yeeeehaaa. brian bx

[DanCon]

Marsha

You are hilarious, you make me smile, we all need a smile and you provide plenty. xx

Lesley

[worriedmum]

Couldn't agree more with everyone! I spent my entire childhood outdoors, my teens working on farms and every spare minute since outdoors. Lost count of the number of times I've had sunburn on my nose, arms, shoulders etc... and where do I get my melanoma? On a bit of my thigh I swear has never seen the light of day in my life, much less been burnt! And my gazillions of (so they say) sun-induced moles on my upper body are still perfectly fine. Humph! Maybe what I did wrong was leave the hotpants in the shop...